MPC 23th April 2006.April 23 - Ephesians 4:1-16 - "Each Other"
Garnet Swann MPC 23th April 2006.
Have you ever done people-watching? You know, it's where you sit somewhere and from your vantage point and just observe what others are like. Can be very interesting watching people. I've done my fair share of it while sitting in cafés. It's amazing what you can pick up when you just sit still and observe. There's the two women who are obviously mother and daughter who are having a rare outing together. There's the waitress who's new - shifting very nervously around the tables taking orders. Or that guy in the corner in his suit - perhaps some company exec on a business trip. As you sit there and observe, it's fascinating to think that these individuals with no connection - from their own worlds - come together for this brief moment, then separate off again.
Well, today I want us to do a little exercise of people-watching ourselves. So - what I want you to do - have a look round and take note of who's sitting around you. Go on. Don't be shy - give it a go. Take you 5 seconds to do a scan around. Look at who's behind you, to the sides, front. If you want, you can have a good watch to see if the person in front of you has dandruff!
It's actually going to be handy having a physical sense of those around you - we'll get to that. But the whole theme of today's talk is that being a Christian, being part of church is not about sitting back, observing. Rather it's about being involved with each other. What I want to talk to you about today is that being a Christian is not about sitting back, coolly watching how others are going, as if you're one individual and they're other individuals disconnected from you. But rather we're are in relationship and we should have a passionate commitment to each other.
I want to talk to you about this today because we've just passed Easter; the first term of the school year is over. The year is quickly passing by. And so I think now's the right time to take stock and think about how we're going as a church. And we're going to do this by having a look at those words from Ephesians chapter 4. The title of the talk is called 'Each Other'. If you look at the talk outline, it has that phrase 'each other' all the way through it. That tells you where we're heading. So this morning I want to prove to you - I want to remind you - I want to excite you, how we should have a focus on each other. And as you're reminded and excited, my hope is that God would be at work to continue to grow and build our church.
So as we look at this passage, the first thing I want us to be aware of - is that we're united to each other. And it's a unity that comes not because we're naturally alike or share the same interests, but it's a unity that comes from what God's done for us. And we see it there v4-6:
There is one body and one Spirit - just as you were called to one hope when you were called - one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all…
See, the unity that we have is because together, we as Christian people share in the same experience of being saved by God, belonging to God. You know, there are over 100 people in this room - but from what it says here, we're one body together, we have one Spirit, one Lord.
Now, as we think about our relationship - as we move from thinking that we're disconnected individuals - to something so much more - this is the fundamental truth we need to understand. We're united.
There are a lot of things that makes us different from each other.
Just the issue of work, I came to realise that we're a pretty diverse bunch.
Here we have secretaries, scientists, students, shop assistants, sales reps. That's the letter S. With another letter - B, I found out we have here boiler makers, builders, bus drivers, bird breeders.
We're a diverse bunch. And from every angle we'll find differences. Think about the people you had a look at before - next to you, behind you, in front of you. Some are young, some are old. Some have different ethnic backgrounds. You may not like the same TV shows or the same kind of music. Some will have families. Some will be single. Some like footy season, some couldn't care less. We're very different.
And that diversity is good. But for all those who are Christian - we share in something that binds us. And that's the most important thing of all - we belong to God. We share in the same experience of having the same Spirit, following the same Lord.
There's that saying that goes, "you can't choose your relatives" - it sort of gives you a bit of comfort when you have to spend time with the Uncle who never stops making bad jokes or that Aunty who smells funny. Well, it really works the same for us. "We don't choose each other". In a way we're a motley crew. Would all of us ever naturally choose to spend time together? But we're united. We're united because we're all equally precious to God. And that's the fundamental thing as we think about our relationship with each other.
And so if that's the unity that God gives us, I now want us to think about the part we play in expressing this unity. That's the funny thing. There's a unity that we have no control over - it's what God does for us, making us his children.
But we're also called to do something to show that unity - to keep that unity. And that is, we're to seek the good of each other. And this is v1-3. I'll read those verses again.
As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
Here we see that Christian people are called to be active in pursuing positive relationships with each other - keeping our unity. And to keep that unity it will require humility and patience, and bearing with one another.
As we think about the things that make us diverse we need to ensure that this diversity does not mean divisiveness. That's how the world operates - driving barriers between people because they're different. But we're to be humble with each other - not thinking of ourselves too highly. But thinking highly of others. And these verses have that very helpful phrase 'bear with one another in love' - acknowledging that it's hard sometimes, that it just takes work.
There are those we find a bit awkward. Maybe they can't naturally talk about the things we naturally talk about. Maybe they just talk on and on and butt in when you want to say something. Maybe there are those who've said things in the past to hurt you - maybe said some sort of off-hand comment, that you've taken to heart.
But we're to bear with one another in love.
Notice that maintaining unity is not about serving each other cake and tea after church - being nice and smiling. It's so much more active. It's something we need to make every effort at doing.
I think the thing that will allow us to do this - is being reminded what God's like. The first few of chapters of Ephesians is all about this - Through Jesus, God reached out in love - to save sinful people like us. We're precious in his sight. You're precious in God's sight so is that person who might get on your nerve. So who are we to turn up our noses at those who God dearly loves? Let's work at showing God's character of love and patience to others.
God's given us a unity here at MPC. But let's keep working at expressing that unity. Don't let our differences, don't even let our sin get in the way. Treat those here as God has lovingly treated you. Pursue peace and the good of each other.
Well, I think as we keep looking at this passage it's very clear on one particular way we can seek the good of others, and that is in the way we speak. We're to speak for the benefit of each other.
We see it there in v15 - Speaking the truth in love.
It's very easy to speak the truth but not do it in love. Do it in a way that isn't sensitive to the feelings of others. You can speak just for the sake of winning an argument. You can gossip - which may involve truth but never involves love. But we're to speak in a loving way that helps the person. Before you open your mouth, it's always worth thinking whether what you're about to say is loving.
On the other side of the coin - not only should we have the motive of being loving, in fact the most loving thing to do is speak the truth. If we're really going to have a focus on seeking the good of others, we'll be open about what God's word has to say, we'll be willing to show where someone is not living right and point it out to them. When people have said to me 'Garnet - what you're doing is not Godly', I know that they've been concerned for me. On the opposite side, I realise when I've kept on sinning and no one plucked up the courage to say anything - I wish in the end they had. It's my sin, it's my fault - but gee, I wished those who knew, had said something.
The way that we speak to others is very important in this letter. Further down in chapter 4v29, it says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their need, that it may benefit those who listen".
We should speak in a way that's of benefit to others. That should be the criteria of whether what we want to say is worth saying. Speaking for a Christian is not just about not swearing - it's about helping the other person, building them up as a follower of Jesus.
One of the things that most warms my heart is when I wander around during morning tea and hear people talking about the sermon - pointing out the bits that were most helpful and encouraging each other that way. Or when I hear that a couple of people have got together to talk about some issue - and read a bit of the bible and pray. Or when I hear that in a growth group, the people don't want to let the study be an intellectual exercise but really discuss how the passage should make a difference in their lives and be honest about their struggles.
That's excellent. Speaking in a way to build others up really is taking God's word here seriously. It does take courage. As soon as you pipe up and talk about serious things, you're making yourself vulnerable and putting yourself in the position of not being taken seriously when you want to be. Much easier talking about the safe stuff like the footy or the weather, or the latest with the kids. But God does command that we do speak in a way that truly builds others us.
We're to seek the good of each other. And we can actively do this in the way we speak.
You know, this morning is all about the responsibility we have to each other. We're to seek the good of each other, to build each other up. But perhaps there's one image of church that goes against this - you know, the image where the leader is there to teach and build us up. You could say - "Garnet - that's your job".
And we see in this passage that it says something about leaders - v11 - apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers.
These are all leaders types who have a role to teach God's word. And that pastor/teacher person is me. But look what it says in the next v12 -
...to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up.
See, let's be clear - my job, Phil's job - is not to be the ones who have the focus on others and work to build the church - but we're to equip you so that you have a focus each other and build the church. It's not our job. It's yours. How 'bout that!
See how different this is from church being a performance: you come... sit back and enjoy. You're not up in the stands, cheering me on as I run on the field. If anything it's the other way round. Being a pastor, it's the role of a coach: training and preparing the people, who play the main game.
Think of our time together now, as like the half time talk, to prepare you to live lives the whole week, of focussing on each other and building others up.
So we've looked at how we should have a focus on each other. God's united us together. We belong to each other. So we should actively express that unity by caring for each other, putting others before ourselves. One important way we can care for each other is by speaking in a helpful way.
But all of this has a goal. God doesn't want us to care for each other because that's just the loving thing to do. It goes so much further than that. God has a great goal in mind as we focus on each other.
And it's there in v13:
Until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.
Our goal together is maturity. That's what we're striving for. Maturity - that's the reason we have this focus on each other.
But as soon as I say our goal is maturity - you can ask what does Christian maturity look like? That's a good question. You've got to know what you're aiming for.
I've got to fess up and say Kirsty and I have been watching The Biggest Loser. There you go - it's out there now! In that show the contestants know what their goal looks like because they have clothes that they want to fit into when they reach their goal - waiting displayed in this glass cabinet. It's there before them - they know what their goal is.
And so with Paul - he goes on to speak of what Christian maturity really looks like - what our goal looks like. He paints in the detail of what it truly means.
And he says it there in v14 - Christian maturity is when you won't be like a child tossed around by new waves of teaching and deceitfulness.
That's the thing about kids, they believe whatever you tell them. And you see it in Christian circles: so often, people get enslaved by the latest fad, the latest thing promoted, and, of course, sold for money - as the supposed key to living the Christian life.
But the sidetracks can come not just from strange teaching within the Christian church. We can also be enslaved to the world's lies, that a comfortable middle class existence is the thing that life's about - the nice house, the nice car. Lies that will shipwreck our lives. The alternative is maturity. Speaking the truth to each other, so that we're sure of the truth: that our eyes are kept on the truth.
You know, it's interesting that Paul doesn't really talk about mature Christians, as individuals, like. He talks about a mature church. You see, it's about focussing on each other. Christians don't grow in isolation. It happens as we relate to each other.
It's sort of like broad beans. Now, I am a hopeless gardener. I kill everything in sight. But I've learnt that if you plant one broad bean plant, it won't grow. But if you plant a clump, a whole lot of them together. Not only will they be able to stand against the wind, but they need to be close together to get any decent results, to fertilise each other.
I detest beans, but they're a great picture for us - we'll only grow to maturity, as we all grow together, as we focus on each other. I think it makes this focussing on each other stuff all the more special and exciting. As we seek to put others before ourselves we're part of growing God's church to maturity.
Well, I started talking about people watching. And I got you to do a bit of that as well. But as fun as that is, as pleasant and easy going as that is - Christian people can't let it stop there. We don't just observe each other like disconnected individuals passing each other on a Sunday morning. For all those who are Christian - we belong to each other. We have the same Spirit. We have the same Lord. So let's make every effort to express our unity. Let's be humble and servant-like towards each other. Even when there's opportunity for clashes and quarrel let's bear with one another in love. And a wonderful way of building up our church. A way that God commands of us - is to speak in a way that helpful and encouraging. If we're to grow up towards maturity - we need each other. Let's work at it together.