MPC 24th April 2005.April 24 - Genesis 34-36 - "Family Matters"
Phil Campbell MPC 24th April 2005.
I've got to admit, I haven't quite caught up with the Super Nanny phenomenon. It's the TV show that's swept the world. Featuring Jo Frost, the Super Nanny. Who'll come to your house, and tame your kids.
I haven't seen the show yet. But I have seen her interviewed a couple of times. And it seems like she's full of common sense.
Though in a sense it's sad, isn't it... that when it comes to issues of practical parenting, common sense just isn't quite as common as it should be. Last week's episode of Super Nanny USA was the week's most watched show, with nearly two million Australian viewers... channel Nine's most successful new series this year.
Jo Frost says that usually the problem isn't with the kids at all. The problem's with the parents. The problem isn't so much naughty kids. As inconsistent parents. Whose lives, perhaps, are so full of other stuff that they forget to bring up their kids.
Which is where Super Nanny is there to help. In fact I heard someone say that in last week's show, she actually sent the dad to sit in the naughty spot. I guess for being unsupportive of the new regime.
The passage we're looking at in Genesis today, I reckon you don't have to be Super Nanny to spot the problems in the family dynamic. Especially with the father. Here's a tragic story about what happens when a dad abdicates his responsibility for the well being of his family. Here's the terrible account of what happens when a father lets go of the steering wheel. And the family hurtles out of control. Here are the terrible consequences of being where you shouldn't be; of detaching from the details; of sidestepping your responsibility as a parent. Of all the mistakes we dads are so often guilty of.
And there are consequences all round. It's another one of those sections where it seems nobody wins. Everybody loses. It's a tragedy from every angle. Where everyone is doing the wrong thing. And it's hard to even know what doing the right thing would look like. Because the problems run so deep.
You'll notice just on a surface level Genesis 34 is a chapter loaded with the language of family. And it's done in a purposeful way. Every character, almost every time they're described, they're described with their family tag attached. Like usually, if I mention Louise, my wife, at the start of a conversation, from then on I can just call her Louise. And you know who I mean. Do it every time and it's like I'm trying to emphasise something.
Here in Genesis 34, it's emphasised almost every time. And in a way that's maybe quite ironic. Because even though the labels of family are there, maybe relationally they're not.
"Now Dinah the daugher Leah had borne to Jacob," verse 1, "went out to visit the women of the land." Verse 3, it's there again. "Dinah, daughter of Jacob."
Verse 5, Jacob hears about his daughter Dinah; Jacob's sons in the field, verse 5 and verse 7. Jacob's daughter. Shechem says to Dinah's father and brothers, verse 11; and because their sister Dinah verse 13. And on it goes. Verse 25, two of Jacob's sons, Simeon and Levi, Dinah's brothers.
The language of family is everywhere. Problem is, when it comes to the actions.
Because ultimately, this is the story of a family in the wrong place. At the wrong time.
Let me set the scene by stepping back a little. To the end of chapter 33.
In fact, even further back. To the evening when Jacob set out on his journey to the North; fleeing from Esau. We saw it last week. His first night on the road. His head on a rock. And the dream of a stairway reaching into heaven, and his pledge to God.
He calls the place Bethel. And if you look back at the end of chapter 28, Jacob made a vow. He sets up the rock as a pillar. And he says if God will watch over me, I'll come back here. Verse 21, he says, If God brings me back safely to my father's house, then the Lord will be my God... and this stone I've set up as a pillar will be God's house. This is the place where God's appeared to me. This is the place I'll come back to and honour him. If he saves my skin.
And now 20 years have passed. He's been to Paddan Aram. And now he's home. And you're kind of expecting, well, just for tidyness if nothing else, just to tie up the loose ends of the story, he'll go back where he started.
And yet he doesn't. Back to the end of chapter 33. He's back in one piece. And verse 18, he arrives safely at the city of Shechem in Canaan... and camps... within sight of the city. Which is a reminder, for those with good memories, of his great uncle Lot. Who back in chapter 13 pitched his tents a bit too close to the city of Sodom. And ended up in disaster.
It's like saying I think I'll move my family in to Fortitude Valley. I think I'll rent a room at the back of a brothel. Bring up the kids in that sort of wholesome environment.
But the city lights are so appealing. For a hundred pieces of silver, he buys the plot of ground to pitch his tent. And sets up an altar there. Instead of Bethel where he'd promised.
Jacob's put his family in the wrong place. At the wrong time. Because instead of settling down and getting comfortable among the Canaanites, he should have kept his distance.
So it's almost no surprise when tragedy strikes. Dinah, chapter 34 verse 1, who as we've seen is the daughter Leah bore him, Dinah goes out to visit the women of the land.
And apparently not just the women.
Dinah's about 15. And the custom is, a daughter never goes out unattended by a chaperone who's appointed by her father.
That's what ancient near eastern Fathers are meant to do.
But Dinah, apparently, is on her own.
These are the women of the land that her Grandmother had warned about. These are the ones Rebecca was talking about when she said, "If Jacob takes a wife from among the women of this land, my life won't be worth living." Because among other things, they were promiscuous. And now pretty young Dinah's out with them.
And when Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, who's the ruler of the area, when Shechem sees her, he takes her. And verse 2, he rapes her.
Here's a young guy who's used to getting exactly what he wants. Here's a young guy with no limits. He's raped her. But now he decides he rather likes her. And wants to keep her.
So verse 3, he decides to chat her up. First the sex. Then the romance. "His heart was drawn to Dinah daughter of Jacob," verse 3, "and he loved her. And he speaks tenderly to her." And then in verse 4, speaks less tenderly to his father. get her for me. get me this girl as my wife.
Now at this point with his daughter unsupervised out on the town and the worst case scenario unfolding, the scene switches back in verse 5 to Jacob. Who's facing a number of dangers. In fact, the whole family, the family that carries God's promise of blessing for all the world, the whole family are faced with a whole set of dangers. The danger of no reaction. Especially Jacob. The danger of being absorbed. And the danger of over-reaction.
Now when your daughter doesn't come home when she's meant to and you get word she's been raped, how are you meant to react? Because the bizarre thing is, when Jacob gets the news, he does nothing.
I'm not sure what exactly I want him to do. But I want him to do something. To show that he cares. I want him to do something like the parents of those kids in jail in Bali for drug running. There's not a whole lot they can do, but they just want to be there and hug their kids through the bars. So they drop everything and get there as fast as they can.
Jacob says nothing. Jacob does nothing.
When Jacob hears his daughter Dinah has been defiled, verse 5, it's kind of at an inconvenient time. The boys are out in the paddock with the livestock. And I guess he doesn't want to disturb them. So he says nothing. And does nothing. he keeps quiet about it, says verse 5, until they came home.
So far, it looks like this is a dad who just doesn't get it.
And the vacuum he's left is going to be filled by his sons. In a totally inappropriate way. Because you'll notice from this point on, it's not Jacob calling the shots at all. It's his sons.
Hamor turns up to talk a deal. Dad to dad. Jacob's sons have come in from the field, because they've heard what's happened from someone else. And they're seething. Filled with grief and fury. Both of which I'd suggest are quite appropriate reactions, for some reason not shared by her dad. The fact is, Shechem's done a disgraceful thing. And it's right to be angry. And it's right to grieve over something like this. And Jabob's sons are intent on making Shechem pay. As usual with this family... in a devious way. Except as usual in Genesis, there's deception all round.
Hamor turns up with smooth words. And a dangerously deceptive offer.
Hamor says to Jacob, "My son Shechem has his heart set on your daughter." (Okay, he might have gone a bit far. But let's turn this into a win, win.) Let's do a deal. Intermarry with us, verse 9. You're living on the edge of town anyway. Come and join us. Give us your daughters, and take our daughters for yourselves. Settle among us. Live with us, trade with us, the land is wide open. Do real estate deals.
Which in a way sounds fine. In fact, in a way it's exactly what's been happening already. Except this is the promised land. Which in good time God's going to give them as their own. These are going to be the distinctive people of God's promise. Rather than to simply blend in with the crowd.
Which is exactly what Jesus is on about much later when he said his followers were meant to be salt and light. Standing out because we're different in our attitudes and our values and our lifestyle. Hamor says to Jacob, blend in.
Which is a danger. Jacob's settled on the outskirts of town already. Now it's just a matter of one more small step. Make an honest woman of his daughter, make friends with the locals. What could possibly be wrong with that?
Except you can see the danger spelled out in verse 20; where you get to hear Hamor talking to his townsmen. He says, let's do the deal. But the reality is, he's planning a takeover. He says, "Let's do what they're asking. Because then," verse 23... "won't their livestock, their property and all their other animals become ours?"
Which of course they will. Because the sort of compromise that's being talked about, I've seen it countless times. The Christian who says, I'll compromise with the world just on these few things just to make Christianity more acceptable. And before you know it, there are no Christian distinctives at all. Hamor the Hivite is very clear. He's been dangling a very attractive sounding offer to the Israelites. But his plan is to absolutely absorb them. Til there's nothing left.
But you need to notice, Jacob's sons have got a plan of their own.
Verse 11, Shechem has said to Dinah's father and her brothers, "Set your price." He says make the bride price as high as you like. Anything. Just give me the girl.
At which point Jacob's sons step in. And in verse 13, reply deceitfully, with a kind of a mock indignation, and spell out their conditions.
And so we move on to the next point in the outline, which is the danger of over reaction. Seems like Jacob as Dinah's dad is doing nothing. He's the one who should be indignant.
But in verse 14 it's Dinah's brothers who are hatching the plan. They say, "There's no way we can give our sister to a man who isn't circumcised." Which is the distinctive mark God gave to Abraham back in chapter 17. To signify his descendants.
So they say, we'll only agree on one condition. That you... and all your men... get circumcised. As if making the outward mark would make it all okay.
But do that, say the brothers, and we'll settle among you and become one people with you. Otherwise, we'll take her and go.
And Hamor and Shechem agree. And young Shechem, verse 18, gets on with it. And then spell it out to their townsmen. Let's do what they're asking. Because then, as we saw in verse 23, all their livestock, their property and all their other animals become ours. And they'll be absorbed.
Which would be a terrible thing. Of course, there's a good way to avoid it. Jacob and the boys could just say a firm no. And take Dinah. And walk away.
There's a less good way to avoid it. And that's to totally over-react.
Which is what Jacob's boys do.
Verse 24, every male in the city is circumcised. Which means they're in considerable pain. At which point Simeon and Levi, verse 25, Dinah's full brothers... take their swords. And storm the city. And kill every male. Verse 26, they put Hamor to the sword, they put Shechem to the sword; they take Dinah from Shechem's house, and they leave. Mission accomplished. And then Jacob's other sons, verse 27, come and loot the city... where their sister has been defiled. And all the flocks and herds become theirs. In a reversal of Hamor's plan.
And all the wealth, all the women, all the children, everything in the houses... it's theirs.
For one man's lust... they kill every man in town.
For one man's impulsive decision to take one woman... they take every woman in return.
For the one deceptive plan to take Israel's livestock by assimilation... the sons of Jacob have taken Hamor's livestock... by annihilation.
And so at last, Jacob speaks.
Notice that? So far, this whole chapter, he hasn't said a word.
And here it is. Verse 30.
Then Jacob says to Simeon and Levi, "Boys, you've gone too far." Well, maybe if he'd been leading his family better they wouldn't have. But he's right. They've gone way too far. Not that at this point he's critiquing the horrific injustice of it. Just that they've upset the neighbours.
"You have brought trouble on me by making me a stench to the Canaanites and Perizzites, the people living in the land. We are few in number; if they join forces against me and attack me, I and my household will be destroyed."
So woe... is me.
To which the boys reply, "Should he have treated our sister like a prostitute?"
It's like Jacob has abdicated his role as Dinah's father. So they're saying, "Who was going to look out for our sister? They got what they deserved."
Except that in this case, absolutely everyone... is a loser. And we'll see in a moment that all of them... ultimately get what they deserve. And Simeon and Levi get a black mark against their names that won't easily be erased.
It's at this point that God steps into the mess. And tells Jacob to go... to where he should have gone in the beginning. Go to Bethel - where you promised you'd go. Build your altar there. Where you promised you'd build it. Chapter 35 verse 1. "Then God says to Jacob, 'Go up to Bethel, and settle there. And build an altar there to God who appeared to you when you were fleeing from your brother Esau.'"
Which is exactly what they do. As Jacob says no more compromise. Verse 2, he says to his household get rid of your foreign gods you have with you, and purify yourselves and change your clothes. Wash off the stains of the Canaanites; and let's go to Bethel like we should have in the beginning.
And so they collect all the foreign gods and the rings in their ears, verse 4, and they bury them under the great oak tree and Shechem, and they set out under God's protection. And they go to Bethel; and they build an altar there, like he said he would in the beginning. Twenty years before.
Now that's not quite the end of the story.
There's sadness. With the death of an old servant Deborah in verse 8, and then tragically, Rachel, the wife that he loves, in childbirth. As Benjamin is born.
And they move on. And we're told in verse 22, they're camped at a place called Migdal Eder; and while they're living there, Reuben goes in and sleeps with his father's concubine Bilhah. And Jacob, who's going by the name Israel in verse 22, hears about it. But in the way we've become accustomed to, says nothing. Does nothing. And stores it away.
It's offensive on anyone's terms. But maybe even more so when you realise that in the ancient world, that's one of the ways you signalled removing a leader. This isn't just sexually immoral. It's a challenge to his father's leadership. Because in a very real sense, there hasn't been much leadership to challenge.
And it's the ultimate insult.
Chapter 35 plays out with a list of Jacob's sons. Verse 23 to 26.
And a homecoming to his father Isaac. Who dies at a grand old age; old, and full of years. Buried, in the last verse of the chapter, by Esau and Jacob together.
Chapter 36 gives a list of the family line of Esau; the Edomites. Who grow into a great nation. But the rest of Genesis isn't interested in Esau's line. From Chapter 37 it's back to Jacob's line. Which is the line of promise.
And if you follow through to chapter 49, there's kind of a postscript to the things we've seen in chapter 34 and 35. As Jacob now passes on a blessing to his sons. To the 12. And has a long memory. Of the things we've seen this morning.
Because for Reuben, who defiled his father's bed... there's no blessing. But a reversal. The firstborn, the mighty one, the one who excelled. Chapter 49 verse 4, you'll excel no longer. Because you went up onto your father's bed. And defiled it.
Simeon and Levi. The brothers who took such outrageous revenge. Brothers number 2 and 3. Demoted in the family line. And the blessing they would have received from their dad is a curse instead.
Chapter 49 verse 5. Simeon and Levi are brothers. Their swords are weapons of violence. Jacob says, I want nothing to do with them. Cursed be their anger, so fierce, verse 7, and their fury, so cruel. And so their family line will be scattered and dispersed.
Which brings him down to Judah. Brother number 4. Whose line will ultimately be the line of kings. Jacob's blessing says this:
Genesis 49 verse 10. "The sceptre will not depart from Judah, nor the rulers staff from between his feet, until he comes to whom it belongs... and the obedience of the nations is his."
Simeon and Levi in their vengeance. Reuben in his outrageous disrespect. Ruled out of ruling. And so from the family line of Judah, one day comes the king that people from every nation will bow to. The King we bow to. Jesus Christ. Whose rule is about justice and mercy rather than vengeance. Who goes to the cross; the innocent one, taking the judgement deserved by the guilty. Whose followers are called to be salt and light in the world, instead of just blandly blending in.
Jacob's family is a disaster. And yet it's the line God brings to blessing. In Jesus. Who shows us at last what Israel should have been. What humanity should have been.
And the disfunctional family of Jacob with his multiple wives and his out of control kids, they're replaced by a new family. God's church. Followers of Jesus from every nation. Including us. Called to be different.
And so there are warnings here. Mistakes not to make. Especially, perhaps for dads. But for sons and daughters as well.
Mistakes of disconnection when you should be connected. Which is so typical of dads. I know. Because I'm one. The mistake of not protecting when you should protect. Of compromise. Of abdicating your role. All failures in fathering.
Particularly significant, too, as we look at the question of eldership in our church. Because our elders, our overseers, are meant to be leading the way. And particularly in their family life.
Turn over to 1 Timothy 3 and read what it says. And compare this with Jacob. Paul says, "Here is a trustworthy saying. If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task. Now the overseer must be above reproach; the husband of but one wife." Do you see how many of Jacob's problems came from the fact that he just did what everyone else did back then with his multiple marriages? It's still the custom today in large parts of Africa. It was still the custom in New Testament times. Not for elders. They've got to be temperate, self controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent, but gentle. The sort of stuff Simeon and Levi did, it's just not on for a Christian. Not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well... and see that his children, if he's got them, obey him with proper respect. Because, verse 5, if anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God's church. Not that it's compulsory to have kids to be an elder. Paul didn't. He was single. Timothy didn't. He was only young. But if there's a family, look at it carefully. Because it will say something about how he'll lead the church.
Family matters matter. You know, it's been suggested that one reason parents like watching Super Nanny is they get to see families that are more dysfunctional than their own. Our world has been swept by the trend of non-interventionist parenting. Let the kids do what they like. With predictable results. Kids who do what they like.
But as the people of God, we need to work hard. Especially our leaders. To hold out against just being assimilated into the world. To be responsible. To be Godly. To be the parents we should be, and the people of God we should be... because the family line of Israel has run all the way to Jesus, who we honour and serve as our King.